Chapter 9: There's Not a Pill That Can Keep You From My Mind.

And his back to me, walking out the door, was the last time I ever saw Spencer alive.

A knock came at the door about two hours and 4 phone calls to him later. It was a police officer and he was holding his hat to his chest. I knew immediately that it was either Spencer or Ryan. More than likely Spencer since they showed up at our apartment door.

"Mrs. Smith?" I nodded and my heart sank, nearly to my feet. "I'm sorry to inform you, but your husband was in an accident." Brendon and Aleks were behind me. Brendon grabbed me under my arms as I slinked down onto the tile in font of the door. "He died on the scene."

I couldn't hear anyone or see anything. All I could hear was Spencer laughing and all I could see was earlier that week when he had his head in my lap and was patting my belly. Our baby. A silent tear tread down my cheek as Aleks closed the door and sat down beside me. Brendon had his arms around me and was rocking. We were all crying.
"He can't be dead. Two hours ago...he was fine. No. It's not real." I whimpered into Brendon's shoulder. It was barely audible, but Brendon seemed to have heard.
"It's real, Jase." He whispered. Aleks was rubbing comforting circles into my back. He'd only known Spencer for a few hours, but it was enough to set him crying too.

"Ryan...he...we have to find Ryan." I murmured. Brendon just nodded. I could feel a warm spot forming on my shoulder from Brendon's tears. It was oddly comforting.
A sudden urge to spill my lunch washed over me and I ran to the bathroom, barely making it in time. Brendon held my hair back and cried into a towel. My whole body felt empty. My head spun and I wanted yesterday back more than anything. Spencer was my life. I wanted my life back.

The door slammed and I knew immediately who it was.
"Guys?!" Ryan called. Brendon jumped up and ran for him. A few minutes later, Ryan was sobbing. It made me cry harder. The room began to spin and flashed black, then everything was blurry. Then completely black.